Monday, April 30, 2007

If it is to be, it is up to me.


And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
-Anais Nin

When we consider how we might have developed our styles of living, we have to wonder how much we do is related to habit, and how much is due to conscious thought and decision-making.

Living an Insightful Life is easy to avoid. We can use any number of strategies to distract ourselves from a painful reality. Excuses can be built into our feelings about ourselves, our actions, the people around us, and our environments.

These excuses that we say to ourselves, help us cope, at least up to a point. If we use them too often or too long, they sometimes lose their effectiveness. This can leave us feeling vulnerable, angry, or just unhappy.

How does hopeful change happen? We simply have to recognize that we are dissatisfied with things as they are. We can then evaluate the situation to determine if they are important enough for us to devote the time and energy to improving.

If we choose to do something, then we must decide how to go forward. Talking with someone you trust is one of the best ways of sorting your feelings out. Friends, family, or anyone who understands your concerns and will be non-judgemental, can be helpful to you.

Many times the people around us (work, family, friends) have unrealistic expectations for us. They might not like the idea of our changing. It can be seen (and felt) as destabilizing. If this is your situation, use the professional help that is available to you.

Make a small commitment to yourself to do something you have wanted to do. Don't make a big change right off but do something meaningful to you.

You can start by setting aside some time in your daily routine to think about the questions you have in mind. If you only have 10 minutes for it, that's fine. For that 10 minutes really focus on the questions.

This small and simple act represents a change of direction in your life as well as a recognition that you are in charge of your happiness. You will have made yourself a priority.

Take the time to consider what you want and if you are on your way to getting it. No one else can do it for you.

Live Well.

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